The issues with dating in London

Dating in London can be/is fun. You have millions of people from all over the world and all walks of life on your doorstep and you have countless bars, restaurants, museums to  provide the backdrop for your seduction skillsl. However, dating in London is very different to anywhere else in the UK, in my opinion. In short: it’s fast paced, more expensive and less spontaneous. Dating is something people fit into their schedule, like a yoga class and it can feel like people are dating for the sake of dating. Here are a few drawbacks to dating in London:

  1. London makes you dislike people

The population of London is just under 9 million and living alongside that many people makes you hate them. To put things perspective, my housemates and I once had a lengthily discussion about the things we hate that people do on the tube. No joke, by the time we had  finished I looked in the mirror to check I hadn’t gone grey, we’d been talking for that long. From people walking into you because they are staring at their phone, people stealing seats from right under your nose, to people asking a clearly crowded carriage to ”move down PLEASE!” – London is a place which can bring out the worst people. I mean how heartbreaking would it be to have a great first date with someone only to find out he/she is a person who runs for the tube? That’s only acceptable if you are running for a circle/district line train.

2) It turns you into an alcoholic

Let’s be honest, Brits like ”Going for a drink” on a first date because as a nation we are overly polite to the point where it turns into passive aggressiveness, and the only way we can get through it is by throwing in a few glasses of vino to break the ice. A few cocktails down your neck and you will be be dragging your date to Mcdonalds for some nugs and telling them your deepest and darkest secrets. Another reason why Londoners lurve going for a drink is because if you find the date is going dreadfully then you can just drink so much that you have no memory of it or how you got home (Please, drink responsibly) However, in London life moves fast. The world of dating apps means we can secure several dates in the space of an hour and that is a lot of alcohol. For Londoners, whenever we go to the doctors and they ask us how many units of alcohol we drink, the reason our consumption is so high is not because we binge drink on a weekend and end up throwing up our kebab in the gutter, it’s simply because we are going on a lot of first dates. Don’t blame us, blame Tinder and Bumble.

3) Lack of time

Balancing a full-time job, a social life, a gym regime, a love life and personal time is borderline impossible. At some point, you have to ask yourself whether having someone to snuggle up and watch Netflix with is more important than having a bikini bod in time for Barca. I greatly value my time, which means I ain’t putting my expensive foundation on for just anyone. If I go on a bad date, then at least I’ll have a story for my friends but equally, I could have spent that time doing my washing, attending a spin class or meal prepped for the next day. Most Londoners are the same, for them dating is something which takes up another few hours in their already busy schedule.

4) Long distance issues

When I was with my ex, for a few months I was living in Loughborough and he was in West London. It took an hour and a half for me to get to London on the train. When I moved to South London (First Streatham, now Tooting) door to door it took us an hour and a half to reach each other’s house. That is absolutely insane and shows you just how big London is. Now, if someone lives over an hour way from me, I have deep reservations. It’s essentially a long distance relationship and this is a serious issue for Londoners who barely have enough time to stop and breathe in the city’s heavily polluted air. If you live in Clapham and the person you are dating sits you down and tells you he/she is moving to Watford it’s basically a break-up.

5) It’s very much reliant on apps

In my house, whenever we meet someone completely organically i.e not via an app we call this person the love of our life because we are so used to meeting people via apps that when we meet someone by chance it seems much more exciting. The reason Londoners rely on apps is because we don’t talk to people. It’s funny really; we can spend a good twenty minutes on the tube with our face in someone’s armpit but won’t even make eye contact with them, but we’ll happily forget all our childhood warnings about ”Stranger danger” and get pissed with a random person off the internet. Sadly, if someone started talking to me on the tube I would immediately be suspicious and be looking around to check someone isn’t rifling through my bag looking for my purse, which shows how Londonised I have become. If you are looking for the Hollywood style chance encounter, London isn’t for you.



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