Songs that should be played on every night out.

Unless you’re having a really bad night and don’t remember any of the songs played, music makes a night out. Apparantly I look really happy when dancing, I even have my own special dance with is one hand in the air, ”windy grindy hips”, knees bent whilst I go up and down – in my mind I look I am Beyonce. However, my point still stands, a great song can make a night fantastic; you know a good song has come on in a club because you hear these ”WOOOOOOOO”s around you, and there’s always ONE person who holds their drink up in the air, and kind of sways to the music – at that point in time, they are actually living the dream.

Consequently, I’ve compiled a list of songs that would make MY night amazing:
1) Get Low – Lil Jon

This is how I get low.

This song is THEEEEEEEEE song to be played on a night out. I always feel a little disheartened if it’s not played. Whenever I hear the intro I just have some out of body experience, I will NOT stop dancing until this song stops, the building could actually be burning down and I’d be like ”Bitch, please I don’t need any of this fire drama, I’m getting low”  till the song finished. If this song was played at a black tie event I would get on the dancefloor, even if it was empty, and do everything Lil Jon told me: I’d get Low, bend over and touch my toes, wiggle with it, I would dance till the sweat dripped of my hypotheical balls. I’d probably get kicked out after for my outrageous and unladylike dancing, but whatever Lil Jon commands me to do, I will do.

Guys, if you ever want to get your girl in the mood, play this song. She could be on her sickbed but one minute of this song and she’ll be up for EVERYTHING, well, I would be anyway.

2) Rihanna and Chris Brown – Birthday Cake (Remix)

My general position when Birthday Cake comes on.

The first time I heard this played on a night out I actually squealed in my friend’s face before turning round and beginning to gyrate my bum in her crotch (no homo), it was a bit disgusting really. I initially thought they were playing the original 1:30 seconds version, but then I heard Chris Brown come in. Now I’ve never particularly liked the Chris Brown version, there’s something sinister about how he barks ”Guuuuurl, I wanna FUCK YOU RIGHT NOW” on the woman he has beaten song. However, since I’d been drinking all morals went out of the window and I was like ”WOOOOOOOO, YEAAAAAAAAHH”, and by his second verse I was bent over in front of my friend and grinding her (Please don’t judge me) rapping along. To give her credit, she took my disgusting dancing all in her stride.

This song is the female version of ”Get Low” and it makes you throw dance moves that should only be thrown when auditioning for a job as a porn star. The beauty is though, that EVERYBODY dancing just as sluttily as you, well that’s what I think anyway, it makes me feel better about the fact that if my Dad saw me dancing to this he’d never talk to me again.

3) Christina Aguilera – Dirrty

This is what happened when ”Dirrty” came on and I was in gay club which has a cage (yes it’s me’)

I know this song is a bit retro now, but it still makes people dance absolutely filthily. The the video for this song  involves Christina Aguilera in some leather chaps just says how disgustingly people should dance to this song.I don’t actually think what people do to this song can be classed as dancing because people move so frantically, it’s like some x rated aerobic workout, you start off normal and finish as this sweaty, panting mess. I remember dancing to this in a gay club (no homo) which has a cage you can dance in, my friend has a video of me dancing in this to cage to ”dirrty” in which I single handedly destroy all of my dignity within the space of thrity seconds, I wouldn’t even call it dancing; it’s just awful. I thought I looked like THE SHIT, but I I just looked like shit.

4) What Makes You Beautiful – One Direction

Herpes in human form.

I know, they’re basically five English Justin Biebers who are the spawn of The X factor, but they release some amazingly catchy songs. As soon as you hear the guitar in the introduction, everyone does this little squeal, even people who don’t like it. My friend has actually seen two males RUN to each other when this song came on and sing it into each other’s faces – beautiful.

One Direction songs remind me of herpes, you do your very best to avoid them but if you get caught then you are screwed. Ok, herpes are for life, but those days when all you’re singing in your head ”BABYYYYY YOU LIGHT UP MY LIFE LIKE NOBODY ELSE” when you’re doing distinctly unromantic things like your washing or emptying the bins, it feels like a bloody lifetime.

5) Carley Rae Jepsen – Call Me Maybe

How bouncers look at me when I sing to them.

I didn’t hear this song until I came back to uni after Easter, and I kind of miss that time. The day I returned to university my blockmate goes to me ”Have you heard that song? It’s soooo catchy!” and I was like, erm what song? I remember passing girls who were drunkenly singing ”HEY! I just met you’! and this is crazy!” and I was just thinking ”Bitches be crazy”. THEN, I heard it, it was a night out and that little ‘do do do” introduction and everyone around me just lost their minds. I had never heard that song before but halfway through, I was not only singing along but I’d managed to create a special dance for it within a minute and a half.

Since then, I’ve realised my night isn’t complete without that song coming on. I’ve now progressed from not just doing a cringey dance to it, but approaching the nearest bouncer and signing it to him (I hate myself).


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